Matt's Audio Letter of the Week

Hey everyone, welcome to this edition of the Feel Better Letter (FBL).

This is Matt.

And today, I want to talk about how to know if you’re actually making progress — especially on days when you’re feeling a high intensity of emotion, a racing mind, or a lot of physical discomfort.

One of the things that keeps a lot of people stuck is how they track and evaluate their progress.

And often, people do this in a way that unintentionally keeps them stuck.

Typically, someone becomes very aware of the thoughts that are disturbing them, along with the feelings that come with those thoughts.

And because they believe those thoughts and feelings are the cause of their suffering, they adopt the idea that to eliminate the suffering, they need to eliminate the thoughts and feelings.

So they bring this mindset into their entire practice.

They try the Triple-A Response, ERP, ACT, mindfulness, meditation, releasing — all of the tools that are actually part of the healing process.

But they use them from the wrong paradigm.

And because of that, they evaluate their success incorrectly.

They judge their progress based on whether the thoughts and feelings are still there — the very things they believe are causing the problem.

I talk a lot about this in the Triple-A Response.

We can’t look at this through a simple cause-and-effect, Newtonian framework.

If we do, it will keep us stuck.

We have to shift to a different way of understanding this process.

Without going too deep into that right now, the key point is this:

When you’re looking at your progress, what really matters is your level of resistance.

One of the things we’ll be introducing soon is the Restored Minds app, which is designed to help people track and reduce resistance — because resistance is at the core of this entire issue.

The resistance to thoughts, to feelings, to experiences you don’t want — that resistance is what actually keeps the loop going.

So if you’re constantly scanning and checking whether you’re having thoughts or feelings, you’re already operating from resistance.

And that will keep the cycle alive.

Progress is not about tracking symptoms.

It’s about your relationship to them.

It’s about the level of resistance you bring to what you’re experiencing.

Someone who is truly moving toward recovery isn’t defined by whether thoughts or feelings are present — but by how they relate to them.

That’s why this process isn’t linear.

It’s not simply a time-based, cause-and-effect progression.

Because if you view it that way, you’ll always see recovery as something that happens in the future.

What I talk about a lot in Taking Back Control (TBC) is that recovery is something you begin now — based on how you relate to your experience.

I know this can be a lot to take in.

But the simplest way to understand whether you’re making progress — even on hard days — is this:

The presence of thoughts and feelings is not an indicator of progress or lack of progress.

It’s just the presence of thoughts and feelings.

What matters is your level of resistance to them — or your ability to allow them without reacting.

So with that, keep an eye on your email.

I’ll be sharing more soon about the upcoming Restored Minds app.

And if you’re looking for help integrating this into your life — and want support, guidance, and a community instead of trying to do this on your own — feel free to apply for Taking Back Control (TBC).

I’d love to support you in this process.

And if you know someone who would benefit from this, please share it with them.

Wishing you all a great day and a great week.

Looking forward to seeing you soon.