Matt's Audio Letter of the Week

Hello everyone, welcome to this edition of the Feel Better Letter (FBL).

This is Matt.

Today, I want to talk about fear and feeding the projection.

When it comes to fear, one of the most common traps people get stuck in is assuming that because their mind says something, it must be true.

This is where pride really keeps people stuck.

"My mind said this, so it must be right."

That belief alone can keep someone trapped in the loop for their entire life.

Just because your mind says something doesn't actually mean anything.

In fact, if you really pay attention to your mind, you'll realize you don't have much control over what it says.

It talks whether you want it to or not.

It creates thoughts whether you want it to or not.

That's why, if you've ever tried to control or stop your thoughts, you've probably realized you're not very successful.

So if you're not actually in control of your thoughts, it's a pretty big assumption to believe that because your mind says something, it must be true.

Especially when, for the most part, your thoughts are being generated automatically based on the state you're in.

One of the things we have to understand is that when fear enters the system, we need to see fear as an energetic field.

When that field arises, the mind immediately tries to explain why it's there.

The emotion comes first.

Then the mind creates the story.

"What if this?"

"What if that?"

"What if this happens?"

It often targets the things that matter most to you—the things you value most deeply.

That's the projection.

The mind projects the cause of fear outside of you.

Now, real danger certainly exists.

Sometimes there is a genuine threat.

But that's not what we're talking about here.

We're talking about those moments where you simply feel afraid, even though there is no clear and present danger.

So the mind projects that fear into the future, into the past, into "what if" thinking.

When you chase the projection, you forget that you are the projector.

And when you feed that projection through compulsions and treat it as if it's real, you're validating something that isn't actually happening.

You're giving reality to an illusion.

That's why I often say fear is an illusion.

Danger is real.

Fear is an illusion.

Whatever your mind is telling you doesn't exist right now.

The more we pursue an illusion, the more detached from reality we become.

Think about sitting in a group where everyone is sharing their fears.

When someone else's fear isn't your fear, it often makes no sense to you.

You wonder why they would spend so much time worrying or analyzing that particular thing.

At the same time, your fear doesn't make sense to them either.

That's actually one of the great values of group work.

It's one of the reasons TBC is built around a group model.

Sometimes the insights you gain from hearing someone else talk about their fear are more profound than talking about your own.

There is a collective element to healing.

So assuming that whatever your mind says is true is one of the biggest mistakes we can make.

Just because your mind creates a thought doesn't mean it's true.

It doesn't mean you need to believe it.

It doesn't mean you need to listen to it.

And it certainly doesn't mean you need to pursue it.

If you've spent years ruminating about something that has never actually happened...

You've been feeding an illusion.

And the more you feed an illusion, the further you move away from reality.

Now, with fear, we're generally not talking about a complete break from reality like psychosis.

Extreme states certainly exist.

But for most people, they would never recommend that someone else live the way they're living.

You probably wouldn't tell another person to spend hours worrying, analyzing, and ruminating the way you do.

So the question becomes:

If I wouldn't tell someone else to do this...

Why am I doing it?

Very quickly, you begin to realize that the only reason you're doing it is because you haven't yet learned how to truly confront and feel the emotional pressure inside of you.

Instead, you project it outward.

Because it feels easier to believe the problem is outside of you—even though it creates tremendous suffering.

This is where real recovery begins.

It begins by letting go of the idea that you're automatically right.

You have to become humble enough to admit:

"Maybe I'm not seeing things clearly."

"Maybe everyone else isn't wrong."

"Maybe I'm seeing things this way because I'm operating from fear."

That humility creates the possibility for change.

But if you continue believing that your mind is right simply because it said something, then you'll always become a prisoner to whatever thought your mind generates next.

That's the problem with projection.

Recovery comes from working with the projector—not the projection.

If this message was helpful, I'd encourage you to share it with someone.

It may even be worth listening to again if it resonated with you.

And if you're looking for support in learning how to confront fear internally and work through it, I'd love to invite you to apply for Taking Back Control (TBC).

Come join us.

Talk to you soon.